Greg Schwem

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America’s Favorite Corporate Funnyman
Called “King of the hill in the world of corporate comedy” by the Chicago Tribune,
Greg Schwem’s workplace observations will have your audience rolling in the aisles with laughter.

Arts & Entertainment, Comedy / Humor

Customized Programs

Greg Schwem’s comedic take on the 21st century workplace and work/life balance has landed him on SIRIUS Radio, FOX News, Comedy Central and the pages of Parents Magazine. More than just a business humorist, Greg is also an author, nationally syndicated humor columnist and award-winning greeting card writer. (Yes, you read that last one correctly!) He has shared the concert stage with the likes of Celine Dion and Jay Leno.

A graduate of Northwestern University’s prestigious Medill School of Journalism, Greg never envisioned a career in laughter. Instead, he settled in Florida, becoming an award-winning reporter for NBC-owned WPTV in West Palm Beach. But the comedy bug bit Greg hard and he returned to his hometown of Chicago, where he honed his standup act in nightclubs. When he began inserting material about business and technology into his act, audience members approached him and said, “You really should come down to my office and tell those jokes.” Behold! A new approach to comedy was born.

Greg’s show provides a hilarious look at today’s corporate environment and the latest tools used to conduct business. Indeed, Greg’s client list includes such corporate heavyweights as McDonald’s, Microsoft, General Motors, IBM, Hyatt Hotels, United Airlines and Cisco Systems. What sets Greg apart from other corporate entertainers is his ability—and willingness—to customize material for his audience while working within the parameters of the corporate environment. That means no profanity or politically incorrect material. “That’s never been a part of my show anyway,” Greg recently told a reporter.

When Greg hits the stage he already has perused the company’s Internet site, combed the internal message boards and even sifted through numerous PowerPoint presentations. “There is no such thing as too much information,” Greg says. “I know corporate audiences like to laugh at themselves so the more ammunition I get, the funnier it will be. Just don’t give me a 10-K report. There is NOTHING funny about that.”

Greg’s preparation always includes a conference call with company executives and, in some cases, an onsite visit.

Customized Material from Past Shows

John Hancock: You sell the U.S. Global Leader Growth Fund.  Is there a U.S. Regional Follower Growth Fund as well?

Society of Actuaries: You use something called “Generally Accepted Accounting Principles.” Does that mean you can fudge once in awhile? Try giving your kids a generally accepted curfew of midnight and see what time they come home!

Bank Midwest: This is a family owned bank. What kind of family decides to open a bank? Were you sitting around the dinner table one night when Aunt Agnes said, “I think this family would be great at originating 86 million dollars in single family loans!”

Besides customized material, Greg entertains audiences with stories about tedious business meetings, SmartPhone addiction, “frequently” asked questions and his fascination with the American Girl Doll company. In addition to his hefty speaking schedule, Greg  writes a weekly humor column nationally distributed by Tribune Media Services. He also is the author of Text Me If You’re Breathing: Observations, Frustrations and Life Lessons From a Low-Tech Dad. And yes, those are his kids on the cover.

 

Appeared in Concert with

} Celine Dion  } Jay Leno  } Leann Rimes } Kenny Loggins } Pat Benatar } Julio Iglesias } Huey Lewis } KC & The Sunshine Band

Customized Programs

Work, Laugh, Repeat

Perfect for any group that needs a humorous break from the serious side of business.  In spite of its therapeutic qualities, laughter is often absent from the business environment.  Greg shows it is possible to laugh at work and about work.  Audience members will put down their iPads and Blackberries and laugh along with Greg as he good-naturedly discusses topics such as Smart Phone abuse, social network overload, never-ending conference calls, “frequently” asked questions, and home office workers. His preparation includes company web site research, phone conferences and maybe even a personal visit!

Eight Simple Rules for Survival

A humorous and motivational talk that encourages audience members to look inside themselves and see how they can perform more efficiently. Along the way Greg  tackles the pros and cons of social networking sites such as Facebook, why using photos to tout your products can backfire, why the American Girl Doll company is so successful and why Costco is superior to its main rival Sam’s Club when it comes to customer service. (Hint: It has something to do with death). Eight Simple Rules for Survival is ideal for sales groups and any organization looking to boost performance.

One Against Three…And The Dog Makes Four

Based on Greg’s blog of the same name and his hilarious book, Text Me If You’re Breathing: Observations, Frustrations and Life Lessons From a Low-Tech Dad, this presentation takes a humorous look at the serious topic of raising kids in a confusing digital world while discussing the effects that technology may be having on today’s youth. Perfect for education groups and family organizations, Greg makes the program interactive by asking audience members to recount their worst “parent vs. child” technology incidents and then encourages discussion.

Meeting Emcee/Video Host

A good emcee needs to multitask. He must keep the event moving, be adept at improvisation and work efficiently with all participants onstage. Greg Schwem has hosted everything from a one-hour awards ceremony for 200 BAE Systems engineers to a three-day conference for 6,000 McDonald’s restaurant managers, to a virtual webinar for IBM customers. He is equally at ease chatting with a company CEO live on stage, pronouncing (correctly) the names of awards recipients, or conducting humorous on-camera interviews with meeting attendees.

Comedy With a Byte

Just want some entertainment during the day or evening?  Greg has over 20 years experience as a stand-up comedian and can turn your meeting space into a comedy club with a routine that combines company information with hilarious real life stories, audience interaction and technology.

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